Yesterday marked Day Fifty of this Strange New World in which we live. I have refined my daily routines to a specificity that embraces my ID, fits my EGO and and enhances my SUPEREGO. My OCD is in exaltation and my Type-A personality is blissfully doped. It’s like refining life to a science, possible only during life in a bubble of one during a global pandemic.
It occurred to me last night, after spending hours in the afternoon reading, the current novel being The Gospel According to Jesus Christ by José Saramago, a tale of comic and story-telling genius. The nightly pot-banging signaled the start of evening, the first whiskey, and the question, « What shall I do now? » Practice ukulele, watch a film, or write something?
I decided to continue reading. And that is when the occurrence, which I mentioned at the beginning of the previous paragraph, transpired. I thought, « Wow, I have never before been able to sit down and be so absorbed on a task for so long. » I have never been more focused and calm and productive. I have never lived with such non-regret, such satisfaction with how I spend my time. I am finally doing the things I somewhat did and sometimes did and planned to do and did a little in the Old World. In our Strange New World, in my bubble, my private pinpoint of perfection, I feel so « Zen, » so free of « shoulda-woulda-coulda. » There have never been so many parts of me so simultaneously harmonious.
Part of it is age, of course. Older, slower, wiser. Part of it is a video that my friend B shared with me on March 29th, a young Day 16 of All This; the video is of a talk by an ex-monk, Dandapani, given in San Francisco on the subject of Conscious Accounting (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iapX9xiDAFY&t=6s). And, part of it is this warp of time that is now reality. The perfect trifecta of Receivership (my readiness due to age and experience), Influence (a fateful reminder at a crucial crux in time) and Opportunity (our Strange New World). All signs point to focusing and to concentrating on what is really important to me, what nourishes my Soul and my Psyche.
(The only thing missing now is Nature.)